Jeremy Greenberg: I Am an Honorary Tuskegee Airman
Jan 15 2010
So much has happened in the past twenty four hours that I’m having trouble deciding which events to share. So I think I’ll give you a quick bulleted rundown of some of the highlights:
Shows 2 and 3: Our shows at MWR East were excellent, but relatively uneventful. Both were well attended, and the audiences were perfect. The coolest thing to report is that the Colonel made me an honorary member of the Tuskegee Airmen, and I’ve got the coin to prove it. I haven’t decided how I’m going to make that work for me once I get home, but I’m thinking about maybe writing a memoir about my struggle for recognition.
Predator Drones: After the show, the Colonel took us out to see the Predator Drones. For those who may not know, these are remotely piloted surveillance planes. They’re very cool, and very expensive. Someone stole the Mangos off of my mother-in-law’s tree in her front yard in San Diego, and I begged the Colonel to send one out to see if we can’t get any intel on who may have done it. He said he’d think about it.
AFN Commercials: After the show, we (the two other comedians and I) went back to on-base housing to watch TV. We quickly realized that no show that we could watch would compare to the entertainment value of the Armed Forces Network’s series of corny PSA commercials. We saw a fifty-five year old man rapping about the importance of registering your vehicle. Then, we saw commercial telling soldiers abroad to go out and see their host countries. I wonder who was worried that military personal wouldn’t naturally take vacation time. It was like seeing a commercial reminding people to eat. That’s just to name a few. The real treat was watching the stiff acting and low production value of these commercials. It’s very clear that budget priority is given to the F-22 program over a poorly scripted, thirty second commercial reminding people that they can’t change their legal state of residence to evade taxes.
Fire Trucks: The base fire department took us out on a fire truck, and let us operate the water hose. When I told my wife about how we got to this, she asked if I tried to write my name in the sand. I was blown away with how much kick the hose had when spraying at full capacity.
We’ve got one more show in Balad, then it’s off to Camp Victory in Baghdad. More good stuff soon!
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Jeremy Greenberg has written for Geek Monthly, Pregnancy Magazine and The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Jokes (Alpha/Penguin). He is the author of Relative Discomfort: The Family Survival Guide (Andrews McMeel). When Jeremy’s not writing, he’s managing the development of his twin, toddler sons, agreeing with his overworked and underappreciated wife, or dodging phone calls from his weird and obnoxious relatives. Learn more at www.relativediscomfort.com
