Wandering Wahls

I recently recalled that the Defense Business Board made a statement about the military retirement program:

“Immediate payout after 20 years has no comparison in the private sector.”

One can assume from this that they must believe that all other aspects of a military job have a direct comparison to the private sector.

Having written that, the reason I recalled the DBB’s statement is that my wife received a letter from the Department of the Air Force regarding her “annual Air Force Reserve Screening.” In this letter, there was an interesting item in respect to her military career:

“As a Retired Active Duty member, you are subject to recall to active duty for national emergencies, contingencies, and brief periods to assessed your continued mobilization availability.”

This letter is what makes me think that the reformers of our military pension system have no idea what a military job entails, including the fact that in retirement there is the requirement to be mobilization ready and be prepared to be brought out of retirement.

Can you picture a bank executive getting recalled from retirement: “Mr. Smith, we’re having a few problems in accounting and you will be required to perform emergency auditing duties deployed to the Dubuque office. Please report to company headquarters in 24 hours where you will be issued your calculator, uniform pocket pen protector, and brown wing-tips with matching suit and tie (we assume you’ve maintained your size 40 frame).”

Now, I am not complaining that my retired Air Force officer wife has this requirement. That was part of the deal in the trade off between her agreeing to serve and the benefits promised. Along with items such as: annual physical requirements; being moved every 2 – 4 years; possible deployment to wherever the government wants her; get promoted or get kicked out; advanced degree requirements; military education requirements; etc.

In return, she stuck it out past 20 years – that whole carrot and stick thing. But, the warnings from MOAA about the proposed reforms still hold – if the government changes the retirement system the way the Defense Business Board proposes, it will greatly harm the military’s ability to recruit and retain members. The carrot of retirement pay for 20 years of service would be gone – most members would take that first civilian job that pays better and doesn’t ask so much professionally and personally (such as having to move school-age kids multiple times).

The issue has taken a back burner due to the proposed TRICARE hikes, so maybe it will just remain there.

Today, I have advice on how to use Facebook for a good purpose. When you’re done lurking on other people’s personal sites (“their kid is still living at home!?” – isn’t this what we all do on Facebook, come on be honest), check out the pages for MOAA and MOAA Spouse. These pages make for great reading.

At the MOAA page, there are updates on legislation effecting military members, ways for you to get your voice out to legislators, and interesting discussion forums (interesting as long as commenters are agreeing with me that is). One recent post was calling for a “few good leaders” to apply to be MOAA board members. I got really excited – I love MOAA and the work they do – but then I saw they wanted officers and not officers’ spouses. Darn – wouldn’t a spouse bring a little diversity? I guess I’ll have to pass this along to my wife. Anyway, you readers who want to get involved should do so: go to the MOAA Facebook page and download the application.

Next it was on to the MOAA page where I fit – MOAA Spouse: another well-run page worth the time to visit. From worthwhile links, to info on spouse licensure issues, there’s a ton of  good stuff there – well worth your perusal.

And, speaking of perusal, that word happened to be one of my son’s study words for his freshman high school English class. And, speaking of high school, the MOAA Spouse Facebook page has a link to the MOAA Scholarship application for the 2012-13 college school year. (How’s that for a segue?)

As the parent of a high schooler, this assistance from MOAA is a great service that I have bookmarked for 3 years from now. Luckily, my son’s high school, St. Mary’s of Colorado Springs, does a good job of getting college funds for their students -  last year, 93 graduates obtained approximately $9,000,000 in college funding (the school starts working with the kids in freshman year on what is needed during high school in terms of grades and activities, and what universities will be requiring in these areas). However, college costs are rising faster than inflation, so I’m trying to be ready with as many resources as possible to help fund college – and I’m letting MOAA know now that they are on my list.

The point of all this is that there are two Facebook pages that are very worthwhile to military members: Military Officer and MOAA Spouse. So, stop lurking, and use your Facebook time wisely – go check out their pages.

Given the social media age we’re in, I look at Facebook and Twitter for news and updates, and as such I am linked to the MOAA pages. On Facebook there is MOAA Spouse and MOAA. These are two great sites that provide military families news, stories, humorous asides, and useful information.

Did you know that MOAA offered college bound kids education assistance? Neither did I. I’ve bookmarked their webpage for 3 years from now!

One of the more interesting items, though, was a news clip on Sec. Panetta’s feelings that military members are a bunch of sheep not allowed to have personal thoughts on the Pentagon’s decisions.

Okay, he wasn’t inferring that exact message, though it sure could be construed as sounding like it:

“…he defended hiking fees for health care benefits and copayments for prescription drugs as a way to cut defense spending and said he expected the military would accept the changes. ‘They go when they are told to go and do what they are supposed to do.’”

I find that a really pompous statement, to be honest. (Doesn’t it sound like he’s talking about a flock of sheep though?) And what I find especially irritating is that he has no concession that the government is breaking a promise (not doing what they’re supposed to do???) or that these hikes will have a financial impact on retired families budgets. At least he could be conciliatory and frame his defense around a message that acknowledges retirees being asked to do something above and beyond what was promised or expected. Instead, he comes off as a typical D.C. policy wonk who has no actual idea of the lives of military families.

So, where does that lead this conversation?

Military servicememembers, friends and family – go and use MOAA’s messaging system to let your legislators know that you’d like them to oppose the unfair Tricare hikes and that they will impact your finances.

Man, February is full of surprises!

First, we get an extra day of the year from out of nowhere. I’ve always thought that the 29th should be a holiday every four years. We could use it to make up for all those lost minutes during the year: waiting at red lights, waiting at the gas pump, looking around the commissary for someone to answer a question (we might need two extra days a year for that one).

The second surprise was as unique as an extra day of the year. I gave a Valentine’s Day present to my wife. That wasn’t the surprise. The surprise was that I got nothing this Valentine’s Day – a first for all married men. But, given that she is still many years ahead of me in gift giving, I really can’t gloat.

The final surprise was seeing my 13 year-old daughter in a formal dress for her middle school dance. I knew she was going to the school’s Winter Dance and that it included a dinner. But who was this lovely child in the pretty dress?

She’s growing up and not telling me. Where was the update memo? At least though, she and her girl friends still dance among themselves and treat the dance as a chance to get together – and not a place to meet boys (that can come later, unless the convent calls first).

There was one more final surprise: a Hummer limo at a middle school dance. What are parents thinking? It’s just middle school. And where does the parental extravagance go from here – a helicopter flight to the Senior Prom?

Maybe I’m too much of a curmudgeon and tightwad.

Well, the results are in and it looks like servicemembers are losing in the battle of cutting military costs. The latest result has the Pentagon hiking enrollment fees and prescription co-payments for retirees and family members.

The proposed increases will drastically affect military families under 65. Families like ours could see a jump from $520 per family to $2,048. Granted, we have a great deal. No doubt about it. But, most retirees and their families, including ours, have planned retirement based on finances that included a healthcare plan promised to members completing 20 plus years of dedicated service – service that, I might add, entailed members maintaining their promises in return for benefits like these.

I don’t think the Pentagon and policy wonks in D.C. realize that increases like those proposed are going to throw a wrench into many family’s financial budgets. Some military members have deservedly used retirement to scale back, take a less demanding job, and spend more time with family (or make up time might be a better way to put that) – all based on promised plans such as health care and retirement (not every member is wallowing in a cushy 6-figure job after service to the government – maybe the policy makers are confusing military members with former Congressional members or current Presidential candidates).

Another possible aspect of the proposed hikes is that the fees will be tiered, based on the retired members’ pay. As MOAA President, Vice Admiral Norb Ryan, Jr. USN-Ret. Points out:

“No retired President, Secretary of Defense, member of Congress, or any other federal retiree pays means-tested health fees.”

I’d love to see Congress debate means-testing their health care costs – put that right next to them delaying a raise on the debate agenda.

There is a way for you to help. Take action!

Use MOAA’s messaging system to let your legislators know that you’d like them to oppose disproportionally putting costs on the backs of military beneficiaries.

I’ll end by quoting a member’s post about this topic on MOAA’s Facebook page:

“…less than one percent have been willing to serve and truly defend this great Nation. They are a special breed that deserves special treatment and a Government that honors its commitments.”

Here’s a cultural item that really irks me: media pigeonholes kids as the same, especially in ads. I just heard an ad where the voice asks “what is your tween actually hearing when you speak to her?” and in the background is the sound of a text being typed (a rather long text too). The question is asked again and we hear more texting. I lost the point of the ad here because we don’t have this problem, nor do our friends. But I think the ad wants parents to be hip with their kids and text to them. This reminded me of when I was a teenager and my mom asked if I wanted to “rap.” Come on mom – my friends and I don’t even use that word. But, she saw it on TV as a typical kid word.

I just wish our media would stop trying to present all kids as super cool, hats worn backwards, Justin Beiber haircuts, super smart with technology (I teach college freshmen and I can assure you they aren’t all tech savvy), and with parents who cave to every whim.

My 13 year old doesn’t have a cell phone, nor do her friends. And they all look at my wife and I when we talk to them. Further my kids don’t listen to Justin and do appreciate music from Adele to Tom Petty to the Beatles. Okay, I did influence them with Tom Petty. But I had to – he’s an American icon!

TV shows and movies are even worse – all kids seem precocious and smart mouthed. But I don’t want to go there.

Speaking of music, I’ll end with a humorous story about my oldest son. now, he’s doing great in high school – debate, Freshman VP, grades, soccer; well rounded. And he works to get good grades and do well. But it is funny to me as I wake him each morning at 6am. His alarm is blaring but he isn’t up. The song he has chosen to play each morning is the Rolling Stones’ “Start Me Up.” I guess Mick and crew just can’t get Joe started (as opposed to a cold shot of water – he he he).

I woke up today to be hit with two things. First, IT IS SNOWING! We have a blizzard here in Colorado. School is cancelled, my son’s debate tournament in Denver is cancelled – about the only thing not cancelled is me having to plow the snow.

The other item that hit me is our cultural icon: sports! We’ve got the local papers highlighting Tim Tebow at the Super Bowl (not playing of course). We also had a big section in the local sports page about National Signing Day, where high school athletes announce what college they’ll be attending to play their sport.

Now, we’ve been in the States for a while, but one aspect of Americana that continues to smack me is our emphasis on sports. I am always amazed and intrigued by it because it is much greater than I remember either from my high school days or when we first went overseas.

As I read the adulation toward the high school athletes who got scholarships, I feel good for them. One local athlete goes to my son’s high school and he got a full ride to Bradley for soccer. This boy is a heck of a kid! Mature, personable, smart – he deserves all he got.

On the other hand, I realize we never read of the non-athletes who are getting scholarships – the kids who pull a strong GPA, make Eagle Scout, do extra-curricular activities: all toward trying to have as many college options as possible. It would be nice if the local paper celebrated these kids as well as the athletes.

Reading and knowing about students who earned non-athletic, tuition-free college rides would be inspirational to most parents and students since most kids aren’t going to get an athletic scholarship. Plus, it would help parents and students understand what they need to do to get scholarships or grants.

But, the nature of sports may be too ingrained for this to happen. Sports tend to override non-athletic interests. For example, the local university gave a football scholarship to a kid who was just kicked out of his high school for months of racist and sexually overt tweets.

I guess he’d never heard of that adage: if you can’t say it at the dinner table, don’t say it. These tweets were really bad – I don’t even want to link to them (one has to wonder though – where were the parents and how did the kid come to think that these comments were okay?).

However, to the coach’s credit, he did justify the scholarship offer because as an African-American he feels compelled to be a mentor to African-American youths and give the kids proper guidance. I grant him that, and think that is very admirable. However, the cynic in me wonders what mentoring would have happened if the kid wasn’t a blue-ship recruit or an athlete at all.

I also thought about our culture’s sports emphasis when I struck up a conversation with another dad the other day. In the course of friendly “dad” type conversation, I asked if his kid played soccer. His blunt reply was, “He plays competitive club.” Oh, okay – I didn’t ask about that aspect exactly, but he felt compelled to let me know. So then, along these lines (I’ve asked both my readers this before, but I’ll do so again):

In our culture would it be acceptable for parents to be equally open about their kids academic achievements, such as being in Junior Honor Society or getting 4.0 as our society is about youth athletic accomplishments?

I’m intrigued by this question as my kids get older and are participating in athletic and academic activities.

Now I have to go figure out whether to root for Eli Brady or Tom Manning. Hold it, did I get that right? When is the game anyway?

My youngest son is a Cub Scout and they just had their Pinewood Derby races. This race is where the Scouts are given a block of wood (7 inches long by 2.75 inches wide), 4 plastic wheels, and 4 nails (for axles). Without the dad’s help, the young Scout is supposed to shape the block into their own design, add weight up to 5 ozs. And hope that it is faster than all the other Scout cars.

The finished products can be everything from whimsical to sleek aerodynamic vehicles. Now, the rules state that the dad is not supposed to help, this is the son’s job. Of course, a little help is allowed with power tools and such – you don’t want to be the dad whose kid is called “3 finger” by the other Scouts. But, overall the boy is supposed to design, paint, put in the wheels, etc.

And that is what Sam and I did. He said he didn’t want to win; he wanted a fun car. So, he set to designing the “Funky Truck.” It carried a Lego skier and two little beach guys he had from his Kinder Egg collection. The color was pretty “funky” too (as well the two bolts that served as headlights). As you can see in the photo, it was pretty whimsical.

It was a fun experience, although the registration gave me a few pangs of father inferiority. There were some slick cars there that a lot of time was obviously put into over the Christmas break – maybe the whole break (Sam did his in 2 days). These cars were well cut, nicely painted and lacquered. I started to wonder if I should have done more for Sam. I told myself though that we maintained the spirit of the race and that Sam designed the car the way he wanted.

In the end, it turned out great. Sam didn’t win. Didn’t come close, he was 7th in his Den of 8 kids (and no, the Scouts don’t give awards for 7th place, a pleasant anomaly in this “everybody is a winner” trend). However, the crowning glory came at the trophy presentation where he was awarded the Gold Medal among all the 12 Dens there for having the best “Scout” designed car. I guess the fact that he designed it was pretty obvious. But, he was elated because that was the prize he was shooting for. As he held the Gold Medal and smiled, my feelings of being an inadequate dad subsided. But there are a few activities coming up where I might find a new home for them. Now I have to go hang the Funky Truck from his ceiling.

Here I am at 50, facing a few of life’s realities. I’ve had my colonoscopy, my hearing is going, my oldest son gets to the top of the mountain before I do, my oldest son is getting his driver’s permit. I can face these; in fact, I’ve anticipated them.

One reality I have been avoiding is that my oldest son will at some point bring a girl home to meet mom and dad. Being an Assistant Scoutmaster though I am trying to be prepared. Yes, I’ve been thinking of a rubric or assessment survey for evaluation purposes (yes, I know it’s really not my choice, but that’s beside the point). I’m not asking for much for here – intelligence, sense of humor (i.e., laughing at this column), thoughtfulness for others, a little culture, and knows the 4th Commandment (the one dealing with parents).

Also, as a military family, we’ve been able to travel a lot, so it would be nice if the young lady had a taste for travel, seeing new things, and was open to new ideas.

Anyway, I haven’t put too much time into this, but I’ve got a few questions so far. Maybe someone among the readers can offer additional suggestions:

Question 1: How many texts do you think you send in a month?
Answer Key:
0 – 30: 5 pts
30 –50, depending on having to arrange for parents to pick me up from after school academic activities: 5 pts
50 – 75: 2 pts Not really so many, like, Facebook just takes up sooooo much time: 0 pts
I have to count!? minus 5 pts

Question 2: What do you think of when I say European?
Answer Key:
I really want to visit there: 5 pts
Socialists: 0 pts
Oh how embarrassing, where’s your bathroom? minus 5 pts

Question 3: Your thoughts on the trend of wearing the pajamas you sleep in to school?
Answer Key:
How embarrassing: 5 pts
Maybe sweats, but my school has a dress code: 3 pts
Silly! I don’t wear the jammies I slept in – I bought a special pair just for school: 0 pts

Okay, it’s just a start. Like I said above, perhaps someone can offer additional assessment questions. Or maybe some for when my daughters’ suitors come by in a few years – just a few questions I can ask while cleaning my gun.

I have encountered two clubs as I hit 50. The first I voluntarily joined but the second was forced upon me by, well, being 50. The two are similar in that there are unspoken aspects of membership. First, I was asked to join the Knights of Columbus at the Catholic community we’re a part of at the Air Force Academy (another benefit of retiring near a base). There are certain things about membership that are unspoken (no, there’s no secret handshake).

However, I can tell you that I’m very happy I was asked to join. I initially agreed so that I could be the liaison between the group and my son’s Boy Scout group; but, after hearing of the work the Knights do, I’m really impressed with the breadth of efforts they put forth to help others and looking forward to helping.

On the other hand, membership to the other group came about because I hit 50. Its membership feels more exclusive though because at 50, there is this special procedure that has to be done while I’m under sedation and lying down. But as a member, the procedure’s name is unspoken – it’s more like a wink and a nod in acknowledging the event. Now, I didn’t know this until I met a guy also born in 1961. When he told me he was the same age, the conversation went like this:

Me: Have you had your…

Him (abruptly interrupting me and saving me from potential club penalty for saying the procedure’s name in public): Two months ago.

Me: Oh, yesterday for me. (I picked up pretty quickly on the wink, nod and don’t mention the name.)

The other thing about membership is that we realize the procedure is rather easy. Other than waking up out of sedation and saying things you wish you hadn’t, the whole thing is painless and anticlimactic. Before 50, there’s a lot of “oohs” and “ahs” and squirming about in your chair when talking about the procedure. But once you become a full-fledged member of the 50-club, you realize the procedure is a breeze.

So, if any readers out there meet our club’s age requirements, but haven’t completely fulfilled all membership requirements, go get that colonoscopy! It’s smart to do so, and there’s nothing to it. ( By the way, disregard that you heard the name from me though, I don’t want the Grand Poobah to call me to task.) In closing, I do want to tip my hat to the staff at Fort Carson’s Evan’s Hospital: great facility, and well run by the nurses, doctors, and personnel. I do enjoy our military healthcare system.